Today my little girl is off to the big city (outside DC) to spend some quality time with her grandparents. I am sitting here with lots of mixed emotions. One because a week ago and even 2 days ago I was probably TOO excited about her time away. I was looking forward to a "Lawson break." I know you are thinking what an awful thing to say about your daughter...well trust me life isn't always peaches n' cream here. I would even go as far to say that she is more difficult at times then my true 2 year old. She is sassy, talks back, does not listen, puts her hand on her hips...shall I go on? I often think to myself "I thought this junk started at 13 not 5." Now this isn't all day everyday, it is just enough to realize this MIGHT. NOT. BE. A. STAGE!! I seriously might have 15 more years of this mess!!
Lawson was watching Madeline on Netflix and they were talking about finishing school and she asked if she could go to finishing school. My smart remark was "where do we sign up??"
Then as the hours were winding down before she left our day went like this...
My little girl wakes up at 7:40AM comes into my room to announce she is making and packing her lunch for her trip up to VA. She made her sandwich, Peanut Butter and Jelly with a few Marshmallows (her specialty), banana, crackers, and water. Collins heard all the noise downstairs and asked what was going on I told him and he laughed and said "Lawson is growing up." Then she went straight upstairs got dressed without fussing, brushed her hair and teeth, moved her bags to the hallway and was ready to go!
She explained to Wesley she was going to Nana and Dah's and she will call and write! Wesley's response was "I wanna go too!" But then Wesley said "Okay sissy, I love you sweetheart." Now there was a little hitting and pushing but if we didn't have that in between, our morning would not be complete. I think hitting is the sign language for love.
Then when Lawson left the house with her daddy I cried like a baby! Why? It is not that I am worried because the girl is going to have a fantastic time! She is going to the Kennedy Center to see Mary Poppins! I think I realized Lawson really is growing up and I seemed to wish her away. Not forever...I just need a break. However, in that final moment of sweet goodbyes all that was forgotten and I wished she was not leaving. As I sit her and reflect I realize all the sassy talk, not listening and other junk that gets on my last nerve is truly her testing the water to see how far I will go. I need to learn to be more patient with her as this probably is a stage (I hope). I need to concentrate on the good more then the bad...Lawson is the most helpful child and can normally see the need before she is asked. She is so loving and so kind. She gives out the best compliments to people and they really make you feel good about yourself! Her teachers from school to ice skating say she is the most well mannered and sweet child, so she really only does the bad stuff at home (my mom reminds me this is the way you want it!!) She is growing up...it is not always easy for anyone involved but it a process and I need to remind myself to always be thankful.
**Lawson just called and she is now at Nana and Dah's house. She sounds so grown up on the phone!!**
I think that this week away will be good for both of us. I am not looking at is as a "Lawson Break" anymore. I am looking at as a week to grow... I need to reflect and pray for us both. I need to grow as a mother and learn to REALLY be thankful for the good and the bad!! Not everyday is going to be a walk in the park but one to always be thankful for. Lawson also will be growing this week and spreading her wings!
We love you Lawson!! Have a fabulous time!!!
